THE QUESTION

I've been reminded of how utterly open my future is, that I'm not sure what I want to do in the slightest. Grad school? I don't know if I have enough drive. Workforce? I don't know if I'll even be able to get a job, and then a job that I don't hate. Devote myself to Jesus? That's scary, and I don't know if I'm Sister material. Backpack around Europe? That kills my options for the future. Settle down and pop out some kids? Sorry honey, but right now that's a definite NO. Go be a lay missionary? I don't know what charity, or where, or what to do afterwards (but I could just think about it then...).

I should really just pray about it. But I keep feeling like the message I'm getting is "shut up and be a student". To concern myself with the present, because maybe I'm supposted to learn something.

Part of me craves a simple life, because those are the times when I've been at peace (no demands, not much stress, ya know?). But then another part of me enjoys the high end of society. But I know I could live on not much. I do travel light.

I do like to travel. Or, I should say, I find seeing other places fascinating and I can handle being away from home for long periods of time.

But I don't know...

So off to bed to play with this question instead of sleep.