So last night I had my first 'incident'. I can't give details, because of confidentiality stuff. But I'll just say that one of my residents was involved in a violation of the alcohol policy. I'm not going to lie, it was pretty intense from my end emotionally. Mostly because it was one of my girls, and I want to make sure that they're safe and ok, and I'm already attached to them. I was pretty glad Derek was still in my room (he brought me Cafe food!) and I could get a hug when I got done with it. And later David called and I talked to him for a bit about it, because he's completely removed from Mount life and drama. I got to sleep at about 4am this morning after getting my report done. Good thing my class was at 11 today. I was still feeling drained from it, though. Coffee helped. And then after lunch I went over and talked to her for a while about it. I think now I can finally let it go now.
One thing that keeps resonating in my head is Brandon Heath's song, "Give Me Your Eyes".
Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the ones forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see
I guess it just feels like it's hard for people to understand if they haven't gone through it. Maybe Benitez was right when he said I'd get a lot more out of this job than others.
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I love your blog because it makes me realize that I'm not alone in being a Mount RA and that there are others out there that are going through the same thing. And it is nice to read it since we do not always see each other like we did during the Training.
~4th Pang RA : ) (Nicole)
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